Category Archives: Baby Loss

Can Come to any Good

7 years ago today I went into the hospital for what might have been called a routine test based on a minor concern. My blood pressure was a bit high. If I remember anything, when I think back, I remember … Continue reading

Posted in Baby Loss, Gabriel | 4 Comments

Bucket List

After I was diagnosed with MS, everyone kept asking me what was on the bucket list for me, what I needed to do sooner rather than later. . . And I had no answers. I’ve never really kept one. I … Continue reading

Posted in Baby Loss, Gabriel | 4 Comments

A Dreadful Weightlessness

It’s the sort of comment that is so carelessly thrown out and it floats in the air weightless. If it finds a weakness, it sinks in at that spot, driving where it finds deep into the ground. Most of the … Continue reading

Posted in Baby Loss, Gabriel | 12 Comments

Syncopation

Back when I used to sing in choirs, occasionally in the alto line you would wind up providing syncopation to the soprano line. Syncopation is one of those 5 dollar words that means throwing something off kilter  in music, quite … Continue reading

Posted in Baby Loss, Life After Children | 5 Comments

Mother’s Day

Mostly it’s just another Sunday. Another day of finishing some work for next week, packing a suitcase, cooking dinner, cheering on a niece and cleaning out the cat litter Until that moment I stop: I pull out Gabe’s scrapbook. Flip … Continue reading

Posted in Baby Loss, Gabriel | 7 Comments

These Moments

I am sitting in a plane, in business class and I happen to be chatting to the man sitting next to me. His wife is 13 weeks pregnant and has not stopped barfing. I know from barfing when you are … Continue reading

Posted in Baby Loss | 20 Comments

The Old Year Ends

I’ve been cleaning out cupboards and shelves in the last few days, trying to find all of the places that things get squirreled away, hidden. The deep and dark corners of an old house, where you put things, and then … Continue reading

Posted in Baby Loss | 7 Comments

Keeping Tune

It gave me pause, that status update. There is, of course, no word to describe a parent that loses a child. Just like, in the end, there are no words to fully describe the loss of anyone you love. There … Continue reading

Posted in Baby Loss, Gabriel | 3 Comments

Faint Hope Clause

“No truth can cure the sorrow we feel from losing a loved one. No truth, no sincerity, no strength, no kindness can cure that sorrow. All we can do is see it through to the end and learn something from … Continue reading

Posted in Baby Loss, Feats of Wonder | 6 Comments

Standing In the Way

I am thankful, on days like this, that the school across from my house is closed. I am thankful I didn’t stand on my front porch at 8:30 yesterday morning and watch the children streaming into the school. I didn’t … Continue reading

Posted in Baby Loss, Grief | 5 Comments