Untethered

I was cooking dinner when I realized it – with my mother gone and my son gone, I feel untethered.

I am not actually untethered. I have a spouse, a house, bills, a job, friends, family. I am very much connected to my world.

Still.

My past and my future. My history and what I should have left behind.

I’ve been thinking of this since Mother’s Day.

There is no place to send a card for your dead mother. There is no one who sends you a card when your child is dead.

There is only me, cooking ground beef, slicing vegetables. Making a life out of the here and now.