In Which I Mention Liquidity Hardly at All.

I am tearing myself away from my draft policy on liquidity, to write this blog. The draft policy is a test assignment from the job interview I had last week, and is due tomorrow, and possibly I should have started it before now. If you would like to scold, go ahead, but frankly, I`m way ahead of you, and I wish I started earlier too.

If there is any saving grace in this, it is that I write policy for a living, and I understand liquidity and the compliance requirements, so I should be able to explain them in 3 pages. Having said that, I`m still freaked.

I am extremely focused on being very clear about liquidity. I contemplated writing about it here, just so you could all understand it, thinking you might be laying awake at night, wishing you only knew what liquidity was, but I decided it really wasn`t that interesting, and you didn`t want to hear about it. I`m not going to talk about it at all.

Back to the reno`s.

This is a mail box, on a post. Except for the really big problem with the letters, I believe we can call the mailbox issue solved. Also, I can`t show you the rest of the porch, because I have only painted the one railing, so you could see the effect. Yes, that`s right, I was painting a railing, in weather that was threatening rain, while not writing about liquidity, so I could show you the entire effect. Also, because like all painting situations, I knew I would start putting the paint on, and I would panic and hate it, and think I had the biggest mistake of the entire universe, bigger even than a bank who screws up their liquidity ratio`s, and suffers a company specific event, and thus suffers a liquidity failure, also known as a funding deficit.

Tell me you like the paint.

Anyway. Micheal`s is apparently doing inventory for the month of August, which means that they aren`t re-stocking anything.

So, Micheal`s doesn`t have any letter “L` or any number 1`s left, which is going to make it really hard to paint them white and put them on my mail box (spelling `MAIL`), or on the plaque which will have my house number on it. It`s rather like it would be if senior management had not established a market access strategy and did not delineate between first and second priority assets to release in the case of a company-specific liquidity crises, as part of their OFSI mandated contingency plan.

(and because I will almost certainly forget to ask, yes Martha, I do need you to check your Michaels, please!)

Ah, freshly painted blue door, with charming letter slot (not functional) picked out in silver paint. Also, nice, drooly mastiff, looking about as fierce as OFSI would were they to discover that you did not have templates of your liquidity reports for them to view, as part of your liquidity and funding plan.

And finally, jack hammered concrete, which Mr. Spit is calling `the cobblestone effect`, that is treacherous to walk on, only an initial step in bigger project to get pavers put in and reflects a need for significantly more work, much like an organization that has only completed one liquidity stress test, and not used the most conservative of assumptions.

Also, dear J. came by tonight, looked at our back door, refrained from laughing at the Joe Job of the previous owner and told us that not only did everything have to come out, we needed to buy a new door, and we also needed to come up with a way of shoring up the sagging flooring. All of this in a bid to finish mudding and taping some dry wall, and fixing up the flooring in the back entrance to our house. It is perhaps worth noting that we started the entire front porch project because the floor was sagging, and we didn`t like the outdoor carpet.

(and you were asking how these things got started).

Well, that`s it for me tonight, and look, I didn`t talk about liquidity at all!

Also, I don`t know why my apostrophe`s are all wrong. I can`t figure it out, and since it relates to neither home reno`s or liquidity, I`m not going to worry about it.

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15 Responses to In Which I Mention Liquidity Hardly at All.

  1. Mr. Spit says:

    It's past midnight. My brain has officially gone into meltdown after reading your treatise on liquidity.

    Oh look, a cat!

    And yes, it's cobblestones! A little polymeric sand and we're calling it D-O-N-E. The heck with spending more money at Rona!!!

  2. B says:

    Very Spiffy Mr and Mrs Sipt. I am jealous of your DIY know how.Last time I tried to replace a plastic light socket (with dad giving instructions on the phone)I managed to make th light switch turn the fan on and half light to the bathroom and hallway, the fan switch became the heater and the heater switch stopped doing anything! What the? We kinda got used to the new arrangement until the next time we had to call an electrician. Now my husband won't let me do anything except call the man. Meanie.

  3. Jacinta says:

    Good luck with the interview Mrs Spit. I think if your treatise on liquidity is half as good as the average blog post, then you are in with a grin!

  4. Debby says:

    Isn't there a song? 'Silent Liquidity?' That might help, in place of the missing templates?

    *rubs hands together briskly*

    Well, that's one problem solved for you. Why don't we bring out the bottle and pass the liquidity?

  5. loribeth says:

    I'm hoping the interview is with my bank's finance department. Your non-post on liquidity is far more entertaining than anything I have ever read in the MD&A section they write for our annual report. :p

  6. Jen says:

    I like the paint very much. I also like the cobblestones. I think you could get away with that.

    You've reminded me that I also need to go to Michaels.

  7. Martha says:

    I love the paint color!! I am on my way to Michael's, thanks for the close up of the label and the pen reference for size. Muchas Gracias. I will be in touch promptly re.the status of two #1s and one L for this beautiful mailbox.
    Wow, this project is really turning into quite the bite into Your Liquidity.
    Good luck w/the job interview stuff.

  8. Two Hands says:

    I love the paint and can't wait to see it all finished. As for the…um, other stuff. I have a head cold and I'm afraid that has only served to amplify the feeling that I am on one of those teacup rides going way, way too fast.
    I believe you when you say you know what you're talking about, but I have to admit, I have no idea.

  9. Bluebird says:

    No freakin clue what liquidity is 🙂 Best of luck completing the assignment. And yes, I do love the paint!

  10. JamieD says:

    How fantastic! Your repairs (not renovations) look so fabulous. While the $186 mail box did sound spectacular, I think the wood 'mai' box is perfect.

    The last time we did repairs to that degree, we almost got divorced. Right after a ceiling full of spackle and paint came right down on Hubby's face and I couldn't stop laughing.

  11. ..... Carmen says:

    The cobblestone effect is awesome – lol. In pictures you would never know it was treacherous to walk on 😉 Love the mailbox, I can check for letters here if you like? And the apostrophes remind me of the french accent egu (sp?).

  12. Carbon says:

    I <3 the paint. 🙂

    Also, I must say that last minute panic truly is the BEST motivator for some individuals that shall remain nameless. (As I look forward to several due dates aligning in cosmic calamity)….

    Last but not least, sometimes apostrophes misbehave if you compose in one format and copy/paste into another (write in Word, copy/paste to blogger). If this is your issue, you can solve it by pasting into notepad or other .txt only format as an intermediary, then copying and pasting from THAT into Blogger.

  13. Natalie says:

    I have to say, I actually like the "cobblestone effect"… looks very nifty! Too bad it's coming out. 😛

    i do the freaking out about paint colors too. A lot. So my question is… do YOU like it?

  14. excavator says:

    I like the paint!

    And, like someone mentioned earlier, the only liquidity I understand is alcoholic.

    Here's to remodeling!

  15. Trish says:

    I like the paint. You're still making me tired.
    You could have built a house from scratch by now. Your patience is unending.

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