I’m not into woo-woo. I call it woo-woo and I’m pretty fierce about science and evidence. I get exposed to woo-wo0 – I have a fair number of friends who are. I guess I should be clear – I’m not into it, probably don’t want to discuss it with you, but by in large (excepting those who don’t vaccinate their children) I’m happy to let you believe what you want. I don’t have to believe in what you believe for us to be friends.
All the same, every time I went to my esthetician’s I picked up the rose quartz she had on her counter. Large enough that it sat squarely in my hand, I would hold it to my chest and close my eyes. I actually didn’t even know I did this, didn’t realize until she moved it and I reached for it and it wasn’t there. I couldn’t have told you why I did this. If pressed – when pressed – I admitted, rather incredulously, I did it because I felt better with it in my hand.
Last year, around the start of the summer, she sent it home with me. It sits on my desk at home off to the side, by the external monitor.
A thing happened yesterday. It was a bit traumatic and it hurt. The sort of pain that is fast and rare and I can’t really talk about it here. It was the right thing to do, which meant, as far as these things go, it was not the easy thing to do. In fact, it was super hard. I’ll be ok. I am well loved and supported and I know that I have done the best thing in the best way I could and I am learning, finally, that’s all any of us can do.
So, there I was writing an interim report and crying and I picked up the rose quartz. Held it to my heart.
Look – this isn’t the point where I tell you that some form of magic happened. Nothing changed.
Save this – I sent a text to a friend and said “I need a hug”. I went and had a fresh cup of coffee and I sat down and wrote about my feelings. I resolved to sit and watch some Doctor Who tonight after I went to the gym. I ate lunch and drank water even though I didn’t feel like it.
I practiced several forms of self care. Which do not come easily to me. I told myself that I had thought carefully about what to do, did it thoughtfully and I had done the best and kindest job I could do and that’s enough.
And I held the rose quartz to my centre.
I googled it as I wrote this. There’s a lot of woo-woo, but rose quartz represents nurturing, compassion, tenderness, nourishment and tenderness. It’s one of the most abundant crystals.
Which seems about right. Self care should be abundant.