Vaccine in my Arm

I am not dead, but also not alive.


You would think I might have something more profound to say. I’ve worked every day since Christmas. The days blend together. It’s work and school and school and work. I live in a countdown of releases. I have a better chance of telling you what system functionality went live today than I do knowing what day of the week it is. I’ve given up on dressing up for work, most days I’ve given up on makeup. I’d have to look in the mirror, but I’m not entirely sure I brushed my hair before I bundled it into a hair clip.

I have one more essay to write for grad school, and then I shall have an entire glorious summer off. I am taking the last week of April off, which means that I have 8 days left before vacation.

Spring is happening around me. For now, I mostly see it out of my office window. It looks like there are buds on trees. I think it’s getting warmer.

I’ve ordered plants from the catalog. I started some herbs from seed, I sometimes pause and add to a list of things I want to do when I get a week off.

On Monday night I got my first dose of vaccine. This means . . . not much. It means nothing for at least 2 weeks, and then after those 2 weeks, it means I’m less likely to die if I get Covid.

Not dead. Also not alive.

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3 Responses to Vaccine in my Arm

  1. I worry that we have, of late, become so fearful of death that we have forgotten how to live – so frightened of the dark we forget the joy of light.
    Robert Graves wrote a poem after the death of his son – it makes me weep

    Not Dead

    Walking through trees to cool my heat and pain,
    I know that David’s with me here again.
    All that is simple, happy, strong, he is.
    Caressingly I stroke
    Rough bark of the friendly oak.
    A brook goes bubbling by: the voice is his.
    Turf burns with pleasant smoke;
    I laugh at chaffinch and at primroses.
    All that is simple, happy, strong, he is.
    Over the whole wood in a little while
    Breaks his slow smile.

  2. Phoenix says:

    Congrats on your herb growing and your first vaccine dose! I am happy to hear you will have a break soon!! Wishing you rest and all the best.

  3. loribeth says:

    Glad to hear you got your first shot! My parents got theirs last week, and my sister goes on Sunday. It’s been a loooonnngggg year-plus, but I am seeing a faint glimmer of light on the horizon…!

    I hope you’re enjoying your break!

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